Loving Lenore: Lesbian Sex; Relationship

I, Ava, am bisexual. My dear friend Lenore is bisexual. We grew up together, but as I explain in detail in my about Ava section, I just accepted that I am bi. As my sexuality came to light, I turned to my best friend, Lenore, and my partner, Vance.

It Started With a Dream

Until the last four months, every sexual dream was actually a nightmare and always included women. (I can literally think of only one exception, I had a dream that was a memory of having sex). Then one night approximately four months ago, I had a rather ethereal dream of being with a woman.
The dream was not terribly descriptive, it was a watercolor of my bisexuality. One of the only details I can see clearly id that the woman is blond, which is Lenore’s natural color.

Puzzling Out My Bisexuality

I told Lenore about my dream, but I felt so awkward questioning myself because when I thought about women naked in a sexual way I felt disgusted. A week of struggling with this duality in my head, I had a realization. I equated all naked, sexual women to my sister, Bitch, who abused me.

This was a true revaluation, but I still could not quite allow myself to experience arousal from women. I could not think of any sexual act with a woman that wouldn’t leave me either sobbing on the floor or running, screaming from the room. I discussed this with Lenore, and she revealed that I am her exact type. In her words,

I don’t expect you to ever heal enough to want to pursue it. However I’m just going to throw it out there that you’re my type. Red head, busty, I mean, just so you know, I’m game in the off chance you ever consider it.

Breakthrough

On a Thursday night, I was sitting on the couch in my parents house. I was playing around on my phone, the TV was on, nothing I would be embarrassed for my parents to witness. My brain whispered a single phrase, “Strapon.” Suddenly I knew I was bisexual, I knew I wanted to fuck one of my oldest friends. Suddenly a new world opened up in my brain.

I was very excited to tell Vance the next day, and call Lenore only after telling my partner. I still struggled for a few days, but Saturday, while Vance was out hiking, I was at our place sobbing. It hit me suddenly, the days before I had not slept and could not reach climax with Vance. As I cried I began asking why she did that to me, over and over, then my head responded with “I love myself.”

This was the first time I ever thought that. I’ve always had things I liked about myself, but I never felt love for myself before. It was the most revolutionary moment I’ve ever had.

Lenore and I Fantasize

We began plotting pretty quickly. Vance and I scheduled a trip to Alabama to visit Lenore and her husband, Tim. Tim is Lenore’s Dominant, he is completely straight. Lenore is unsure if she wants to see Tim and Ava together, because the thought gives her pings of jealousy. She is unsure where the jealousy is seated, Tim being with Ava who she’s craved for years, or Ava being with Tim her loving husband. The following is a list of activities we have plotted about.

Privately, Just Ava and Lenore

    • making out
    • undressing
    • Lenore fulfilling her dream of licking Ava’s Chest
    • Giggling
    • Naked Snuggles

In Plain Sight of Vance and Tim

    • making out
    • undressing
    • Ava using a strapon on Lenore
    • Fingers, definitely fingers
    • Ava Forcing Lenore to cum, probably with a wand

Non strictly Lesbian Activities

  • Tim does shibari, rope bondage; Tim will tie up Vance for Ava
  • Each couple having sex in the same room.

My brain gets a little excited and doesn’t like to focus when I think about this special weekend. I know that due to my experiences with Bitch, I will end up crying. There are also many unresolved/pent up feelings between Lenore and me. This should prove to be very interesting.

Last Notes

There is one last and probably very sappy thing I would like to say. When I describe Lenore, I first called her a fwb, friend with benefits, because we are very close friends. I also described her as my playmate, mostly in reference to some of the bondage dynamics we have discussed. However recently I found myself thinking of her as my girlfriend, not because we are committed, but because we have a much deeper connection than just best friends. I nervously brought it up with Lenore, since I preferred it didn’t slip out awkwardly. She agreed that it’s probably the closest term that embodies who we are to each other.

While we do love each other, this love is not a threat to our primary partners. Lenore and I acknowledge that we could never live together as primary partners in life. It is quite amazing to fully feel the depth at which Lenore and I care for each other. So far this journey has only brought us closer together.

Stay tuned dear readers, More updates to come.